Symphonic Junction: Sarah Blake x Hermine Deurloo x RO

What are you going to listen to?

Cantoluzer 

Located in the Dordogne, nestled between a meadow and a forest, Cantoluzer is the name of a small stone vacation home that I had the pleasure of visiting for a few summers. The name means “singing lizard.” This picturesque and idyllic spot was a great source of inspiration for me, and I’m happy to share it with you today to set the mood for a wonderful concert. 

Food for Thought 

During the lockdown, my mom and I were sitting in the living room, and I picked up a travel magazine that was lying on the table. My dad always wanted to go on trips like these: an all-inclusive trip to the Seychelles? Sure! Five nights in Kruger National Park? Why not?! Flight, accommodation, and breakfast in Vietnam? What a bargain! 

But we never went… either the car needed repairs, or our What's ongot so packed that we couldn’t find the time, or we didn’t really believe he was serious about that trip… 

And so I sat on the couch, thinking about all the missed opportunities to set out into the world with the people I love. Or about how many coffee dates and walks on the beach I’ve missed because I was “too tired” or “too busy”… 

Food For Thoughtis a reminder to spend time with the people you love. Because you can, because you want to, and because it’s good for the soul. 

Fantasea 

On a particularly beautiful day in Cape Town, I went for a swim in the ocean with a friend after a long trail run. The sun was slowly sinking below the horizon, the sky was clear, and the water had a tropical, crystal-clear blue hue—very deceptive, since it was probably 13 degrees. With every wave, the colors of the sunset rippled through the turquoise, ice-cold water. Ripples and flashes of orange, blue, purple, yellow, pink, gold, and other magical colors danced before my eyes. And then, just as quickly as they had appeared, I dove beneath the wave and they were gone. Until the next wave would catch similar, yet never identical, glimmers of light. I was spellbound and couldn’t believe my eyes. The pure joy and perfect timing of such a beautiful moment—all for me to admire… 

I Still Think of You 

This song was originally called“I Still Think of You.”“Ainda Penso Em Você” has a bit of a spicy backstory. About four years ago, I believed I was polyamorous—which means I wanted to be with more than one partner at a time—and that was my starting point when I began a fairly new relationship. With that in mind, my partner knew I was going to a daytime party, and he gave me permission to kiss someone. I was just as surprised as you are. With no intention of taking him up on that offer, I ended up meeting a really sweet guy who kept popping up all day long for some reason. We danced among beautiful, swaying trees, in the sun, and talked and laughed about everything you can possibly talk and laugh about… it was all quite magical. 

At one point, he said something beautiful: “People with whom you can easily be yourself should always be around.” That stuck with me, and I told him that one day I would write a song with that line in it. 

And sure enough, we ended up sharing a wonderful kiss under those swaying trees. When I got home and told my partner what had happened, he said, “I was actually hoping you wouldn’t take me up on it, and I shouldn’t have said anything.” Needless to say, things got a little awkward after that… 

But I couldn’t shake the thought of that wonderful person I had met: how the trees swayed in the wind, how brightly the sun shone, how we laughed, played, talked, and swayed… 

So I did what any self-respecting songwriter would do: I wrote a song about it. 

I played it for my partner a few times before I had the courage to tell him that I’d written it for that other person. He wasn’t happy about it—of course. But at one point he said, “This is a really good song, but I can’t listen to the lyrics… if you change them, you can play it at your shows.”  

Long story short: in the end, I enlisted the help of the amazing Lilian Vieira—who also appears on my album*Food For Thought*—to translate it into Portuguese. I went to her house for a quick Portuguese 101 lesson, and by the end of the day,*Ainda Penso Em Você*had come to life! 

Merry-Go-Round 

I’ve always had a great relationship with my sister. Since we were born ten years apart, her favorite thing to say whenever we went somewhere together was that she’d “changed my diapers”… classic embarrassing-big-sister mode… I looked up to her in so many ways. Like a good little sister, I did almost everything she asked of me. I had a best friend and an amazing sister all in one. Things were going great! And then I got older. I discovered something called “thinking for myself,” and slowly began to realize that not everything she said or thought necessarily matched up with how things really were. 

Our relationship was under a bit of strain. During the lockdown, my immediate family was all living together under one roof, and that didn't exactly make things any easier. 

One day, she just stopped talking to me. I asked her several times what had happened, or if I’d done something wrong, but every time she answered, it was about something trivial: “I didn’t like how you said that about me in front of those people,” or “you snapped at me,” or something else that could have been said right away instead of bottled up and blown out of proportion because we didn’t talk about it. A year of silence later, nothing had changed. For weeks, even months, I blamed myself for the end of this relationship. I had no idea what I’d done wrong, and I was so confused, hurt, angry, sad… The thought that our bond could be over because of a comment, or because I’d thought for myself, genuinely scared me. I had all these pent-up emotions, and they had to go somewhere. And since writing songs is cheaper than therapy, I wrote… 

Disposable 

I had a friend who was very dear to me. Before I moved to Amsterdam, she started to pull away. I didn’t understand what was happening. I did my best to stay in touch, but it took weeks before she would even respond to the shortest messages. I felt like all the effort was coming from me, and at some point I thought: if I stop, this won’t work out. If I stop putting energy into it, this relationship will die. So I stopped. I stopped putting energy into a relationship where I didn’t feel valued as an active participant. Yes, she undoubtedly has her side of the story. But at that moment, I felt worthless, replaceable, not worth spending time or attention on. 

Conversations with the Moon 

I wanted to set myself a challenge: let me write something without any deep meaning or grand narrative behind it. What could that be? Hmm… it was nighttime… I looked up at the sky and started wondering what everything would look like from the moon’s perspective… 

A Real Embrace – written by Michael Walker 

"A Real Embrace," short for"Step ForwardandFeel A Real Embrace," is dedicated to Mike's mother. She can also be heard on the original recording of this piece, in which she plays her version of"Hard Day’s Night." 

Precious Time 

"Precious Time"is one of the three songs I dedicated to my father during his battle with cancer. It’s a sweet and gentle song that flowed through me when times were tough. I had a lot of pent-up emotions and wanted to write something cheerful and playful, just like his personality. Because in life, it’s the little things—a walk on the beach, a hike in the mountains, or having a beer together at your favorite spot—that stay with you. 

Life 

I have two friends: one Brazilian, one South African. They had a beautiful little girl, Elena, and for her first birthday, they wanted to give her a gift that would stand the test of time. They asked me to write something they could play for her when she woke up, during the day, and when she went to sleep. “Something timeless,” the request read, along with a few other small instructions like “something in Portuguese.” I quickly reminded them that I can’t just “speak” Portuguese out of the blue… but they assured me that everything would be fine. They sent me videos of this sweet, curious little creature and told me about the things they did together: how they woke her up, how they danced in the kitchen, how they took her to the beach and watched her discover sand for the first time. I realized that having a child actually means reliving the simple joys of life through the eyes of something you’ve created yourself. We settled on ‘A vida com você é a coisa mais linda,’ which means: ‘Life with you is the most beautiful thing there is.’ 

Cold Water 

I’ve always had a special connection with cold water. Especially when it’s the ocean: there’s something about the salt and its wildness that feels both humbling and exhilarating. I wrote this at a time when I longed for salt on my skin, wind in my hair, the silence beneath the waves, the tranquility of trees in a forest, and all the things that make you feel more connected to the earth and its magical surroundings. 

Adventure Man 

I used to have a running buddy—let’s call him Dan. Dan and I would run through the mountains, talk about life, have a beer after a good workout, and just enjoy each other’s company. I started to develop feelings for Dan. Dan started to develop feelings for me. In a perfect world, the rest would have been a given, but Dan… Dan had a girlfriend. And I got the impression that she wasn’t too keen on sharing. This situation lasted a few months, and at some point we agreed that it might be safest to stop running together. It was a difficult decision, but ultimately the right one. At a moment when we were walking along the beach and having that very difficult conversation about “maybe it’s better if we don’t see each other for a while,” he said to me: “I don’t know if you’re going to write a song about this, but in case you do: please make it a happy song. Because we should celebrate that it happened, not that it’s ending.” 

Mailbox 

I’ll try to keep this short, because I usually get carried away when I tell this story… I used to work for a guy as a dog walker and go-between for all sorts of things. He had just moved to Amsterdam from the United States and had brought a lot of stuff with him that needed sorting through, so naturally he asked me to help. One day, he asked if I would drive him home. Normally, I wouldn’t mind, but I had a few things to do that day, the road to his house was closed to cars, and I really didn’t have the time or patience for a detour of over an hour to the center of Amsterdam. Needless to say, this man hadn’t heard the word “no” very often in his life. This time, that “no” was met with a string of rather explicit words on his part, which I didn’t appreciate. After that, he kept harassing my boyfriend at the time. He called him and complained about what a b***h I was and that he’d only asked for this small favor. 

Anyway, after two days of silence, he added both of us to a WhatsApp group and told us we were bad friends, with no respect, and that I should leave his keys in his mailbox. 

I was stunned. Shocked by how quickly the whole situation had escalated. I started writing him a letter, trying to reason with him, but then I thought, “Is this actually helping me?” What kind of peace of mind will I get from sending this message? Not much, really. So I grabbed his keys, rode my bike to his house, and dropped them in his mailbox without a word, without saying goodbye, without anything. And then a song started to take shape. And now we have this wonderful earworm, thanks to a very strange and uncomfortable situation. 

Closing Remarks 

I really hope you enjoyed this quirky, sweet, crazy, wonderful, and introspective little journey. And I hope it leaves a lasting impression on you in the days ahead. 

Thank you all for sharing this special and magical day with me. Thank you to the Residentie Orkest, Hermine, Daniel, and all the administrative and behind-the-scenes staff who make things like this possible. Thank you to Mike for your beautiful piece of music, and to Chris for making this day possible in the first place. To the arrangers Leonard, Gijs, and Marijn: thank you for your talent! Thank you to Sven, Patrick, and Nadia, and to Da Capo for making us sound so good! 

See you next time! 

Sarah Blake